The time is upon us once again for the annual tradition, the game of all games (at least to Americans). Whether you're a Ravens or Niners fan, or neither, car companies are hoping you don't DVR the game or skip past the ads they spent untold millions to make. This year, SUVs are well represented, with the 2014 Kia Sorento, 2013 Hyundai Santa Fe, 2013 Toyota RAV4, and the 2014 Subaru Forester playing starring roles in their companies' spots this year.
General Motors is bowing out from showing ads during the main game. However, GM will run spots in the pre-game show. Chrysler will reportedly have a long-form ad during the Super Bowl, but, unlike many other companies, is not revealing it in advance of its formal broadcast debut.
So here are the spots we know about so far, with the links included.
Kia
Kia attempts to answer that eternal question from kids about where babies come from with an outlandish computer-generated world of Babylandia and what some believe to be cleverly disguised innuendo describing the actual physiology of conception. Kia's UVO system quickly silences junior from sharing his friend Jake's version of the origin of babies. We'll let you decide.
Toyota
Toyota is airing two commercials during the big game, both featuring Kaley Cuoco of "The Big Bang Theory" fame as a wish-granting genie. The spot is completely absent of any dialogue aside from Cuoco asking "S'up?" to the passenger in her 2013 RAV4, a bearded man wearing a bunny suit. The spot features the 1995 rap song "I Wish" from Skee-Lo.
In the second spot, Cuoco reprises her role as a genie, but this time to the suburban Henderson family. She took the husband's wish of "getting rid of the spare tire" too literally, but granted the wife's chocolate indulgence, the daughter's princess wish, and the son's astronaut dream, launching the RAV4 into hyperspace.
Subaru
Subaru has not shown its full-length commercials ahead of the game, but has instead shown a series of 20-second teasers featuring salesman Grant Weber, who's official role is "selling Subarus to dogs." The first teaser shows the sausage-carrying capacity of the 2014 Forester, the second shows Weber in finance negotiations with one of his furry clients, and the third one shows a crafty feline driving off the lot in a new Forester.
Hyundai
Hyundai is showing a trio of commercials during the game, featuring the Genesis R-Spec sedan, the Sonata Turbo, and the new long-wheelbase seven-passenger Santa Fe. The Santa Fe commercial shows a pre-teen boy assembling his tackle football team of choice by selecting his super-strength players from weight-lifting, welding, bear wrestling, and a fire rescue. When asked by the opposing team captain if he wants to play touch or tackle, our fearless team leader and friends decisively declare "TACKLE!"